More Rahmnesia: Chicagoans trying to forget they elected Mayor Rahm

by

63 comments

Rahm says, Dont forget that you voted for me!
This just in—Mayor Rahm Emanuel did not win last year's mayoral election and he isn't, therefore, our mayor!

By my calculation, that race should have gone into a runoff between the two top vote getters: Gery Chico and Miguel del Valle.

I'm not sure why the official results had Emanuel getting over 50 percent of the vote.

I say this because of the reaction to a recent post in which I chided teachers in particular and Chicagoans in general for electing Emanuel. The response was overwhelming. As in—we didn't vote for him!

So, if so many people say they didn't vote for him, I guess he must have lost. Quick—search the City Hall basement for missing ballots.

OK, I know what you're thinking . . .

You're thinking my circle's small, my sampling skewed. I only congregate with people who wouldn't dream of voting for Emanuel.

And it's true, most of my friends tend to fall on the Democratic side of the Democratic Party, as opposed to the Republican one the mayor represents.

In fact, at this moment, I know of only one person who plans to vote for Mitt Romney.

What up, Nadja!

But my survey of Chicagoans is more widespread than you think.

Wherever I go—bowling alleys, bars, sporting events—the reaction's the same . . .

Don't blame me! I didn't vote for him. I swear!

Well, it's not that I don't believe my fellow Chicagoans, but I don't believe you.

It's pretty obvious that a lot of voters are just too embarrassed to admit that they really did vote for Rahm.

It reminds me of the amnesia that gripped white Chicago back in the mid 1980s after white people, scared out of their wits, voted for a white Republican named Bernie Epton for mayor.

In time they woke up to the realization that the far better candidate was the black man they were afraid of: Mayor Harold Washington, the greatest mayor Chicago's ever had!

Eventually, it was hard to find a white voter who remembered voting for Epton, even though well over 500,000 did just that.

They were always like: "You know, I can't remember who I voted for. Let me ask the wife."

In this case, Mayor Rahm brought on the denials by pissing off bunches of voters with his goofy ideas. For instance, he alienated many CPS parents by unilaterally ordering a longer school day without giving the schools any money to do something meaningful with the time.

Then he doubled down on black parents by closing schools in their neighborhoods. Then he tripled down on black voters by privatizing good middle-class jobs that are the bedrock of south and west side communities.

The mayor really must have faith in those President Obama coattails.

He also upset police and firefighters by stalling on contract negotiations. And now he's upset part of his base—the artsy fartsy crowd—by green-lighting the demolition of Prentice Hospital.

You should have known better, preservationists.

The only people he hasn't alienated are his cronies in the one percent, who he fortifies with inside deals and contracts.

They can be counted on to pour in the money for his campaign commercials should he temporarily postpone his ambitions for higher office and run for reelection.

I got to give the mayor credit—it's a sound campaign strategy. As Mitt Romney knows, it's always a good idea to make friends with deep pockets.

Comments (63)

Showing 1-25 of 63

Add a comment
 

Add a comment