by Lauri Apple
Remember how back in February, the National Republican Senatorial Committee made that ad comparing Democratic candidate Alexi Giannoulias to Tony Soprano? Well, the NRSC called up their unemployed actor friend who does the funny New Jersey accent again and made a brand-new campaign news reel dat talks about Giannoulias plus the Borgata, Al Capone, and gamblin', among other things:
Why can't Giannoulias just become Italian already?
Maybe it has something to do with genetics. As my biology teacher told us back in high school, "If you're born a certain nationality, then you can't just 'become' a different nationality. Because of ribosomes, I think." This might explain why Alexi Giannoulias still refuses to speak like an Italian stereotype.
Or are the NRSC people just confused about what "Greekness" is all about? If this is the case, then here's an analogy that should clear things up:
Greek: feta cheese: Giannoulias. Italian: mozzarella cheese: Tony Soprano.
Alexi Giannoulias is Greek and only eats feta cheese. Therefore, he will never be Italian, and so these ads are nonsense.