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But every once in a while a press release comes along that does its job perfectly. It offers an intriguing but informative headline such as, "PHILIP ANSELMO Releases Exclusive Vocal Ringtones – Available Now!" I know what a Phil Anselmo is, but I'm not sure what a "vocal ringtone" is. So now I want to open the e-mail. Inside the information is presented plainly and succinctly: "PHILIP ANSELMO, known as heavy metal's most notorious vocalist, is releasing several ringtones for fans to grace their cell phones with. Ten individual ringtones have been created using Philip's voice, ranging from hilarious to seriously badass!" Which, OK, here I would have dropped in the information that Anselmo sang for Pantera and still sings for Down. But on the other hand, way to trust your audience.
Then maybe add a quote from whoever made the product that you're pushing ("Grab one of my new 'Craptastic' ringtones and be the first one on your block to be full of it!") to add a bit of salesmanship. Then wrap up with the information on how one would go about purchasing your product.
While I'm a strict vibrate-only kind of phone user, I can also appreciate the considerable allure of having your phone yell at you in Phil Anselmo's voice every time someone calls you. After a brief reminder of what a singularly ferocious thing that voice is, I'll reproduce the info on how to purchase the ringtones. I can't speak to the relative quality of the individual ringtones, but I will say that "Bbbbbb" and "Ding Dong" both look intriguing.
To download the ringtones, just text the keywords below to 69937 and your ringtone will be sent to your phone. Charges apply per ringtone.
Ringtones:
Title: Ring
Keyword: Phil1
Title: Ring Inhale
Keyword: Phil2
Title: Ding Dong
Keyword: Phil3
Title: Bbbbbb
Keyword: Phil4
Title: Pick Up the Phone
Keyword: Phil5
Title: There's Someone Calling
Keyword: Phil6
Title: Answer
Keyword: Phil7
Title: Whaaoo
Keyword: Phil8
Title: I'll Keep Calling
Keyword: Phil9
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