Philly noise rockers An Albatross have attracted a remarkable quantity of hyperbole, especially considering that their songs tend to speak their piece in less than 60 seconds--maybe their fans use all that leftover time to think up weird shit to say about them. This crazed five-piece (the usual bass, drums, and guitar, plus a Farfisa player and ranting front man Edward Gieda III) could probably fit everything they've released so far on the microchip in one of those music-playing cereal-box toys: the EP Eat Lightning, Shit Thunder, a split seven-inch with XBXRX on Gold Standard Labs, and the 11-song, eight-minute Ace Fu "full-length" We Are the Lazer Viking. (A new disc, ambitiously if provisionally titled Blessphamy: Of the Peace Beast Feastgiver and the Bear Warp Kumite, is due in the spring, also on Ace Fu.) Lazer Viking earned An Albatross comparisons to other kitchen-sink-meth combos like the Locust and Lightning Bolt, and CMJ dubbed them "the grindcore MC5," apparently swayed by the band's retardo rhetoric about the "Revolutionary Politics of Dance." (Just when you thought the movement would never recover from the leadership vacuum Re-Flex left behind in 1983.) Don't get me wrong, I'm down with the revolution--I'm just not sure how you're supposed to dance to something that sounds like a warped Yes album played at 45 rpm through an A&W drive-thru speaker. Lazer Crystal and Dance Club Massacre open. Wed 1/18, 7 PM, Beat Kitchen, 2100 W. Belmont, 773-281-4444, $8 in advance, $10 at the door. All ages.