So you're invited to a wedding and the invitation says "black-tie only" and you don't own a tuxedo: What do you do? Well, in my case, I pray that I fit into someone else's. But when that tuxedo turned out to be a pair of floppy formal pajamas, I found myself without a decent tux with only a few days to go. Someone recommended Monitor to me, and when I rolled up to the Uptown shop, I admit I was reluctant to even enter, what with its anachronistic sign and garish, brightly colored tuxedos in the window display. But inside you'll find friendly, informed employees who can size up and fit just about anyone in a tuxedo of his preference. Best part: it's about half the price of most other tuxedo rentals (I was priced at under a Benjamin). My only advice is to avoid prom season, lest you want to end up—like yours truly—at an engagement party in an oversize penguin suit.