Ollie Roberts | Year In Review | Chicago Reader

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Ollie Roberts

Truth is kinder than fiction.

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We loved Tim Robbins's Bob Roberts when we saw it in 1992--but we didn't know it was supposed to be prophecy. Thank God there was one important difference between Bob's fictional campaign and Oliver North's real one.

Bob Roberts

Ran for U.S. senator in Pennsylvania.

Traveled in a 32-foot tour bus.

Sold albums for money and got rich.

"Reluctance feeds the aggressor."

Charming in an eerie sort of way.

Said opponent wanted to "give jobs to unqualified people, jobs that could be yours."

Worked with "Broken Dove."

Military school.

Sang "The Times They Are A-Changin' Back."

Pretended to be crippled.

Won.

Oliver North

Ran for U.S. senator in Virginia.

Traveled in a 32-foot Winnebago.

Sold drugs for guns, got gifts.

"Weak men fear strong men."

Has an almost eerie, perverse charm.

Said opponent wanted to "legalize narcotics but prohibit you from smoking."

Founded the "Freedom Alliance."

Marines.

Wanted to "take back" American from abortionists, gays, feminists.

Pretended to be a war hero.

Lost.

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