It doesn't really matter if you're part of a starry-eyed couple or a cynical single; this Valentine's Day weekend is full of events for the everyone from the hopeless romantic to the just plain hopeless. You can choose from more than 40 shindigs in our complete list of Valentine's Day events, but here are our 12 favorite options (including a shameless plug for our annual Anti-Valentine's Day party):
Anti-Valentine's Day Party Whether you're in a couple or looking to meet one of our eligible singles, you'll find something to love at our Anti-Valentine's Day Party. Goose Island hosts a bar from 8-9 PM, Windy City Soul Club provides the tunes, and the first 200 guests receive a gift bag from the Pleasure Chest. 8 PM, Thalia Hall, 1227 W. 18th, realdeal.chicagoreader.com, $14.
Casablanca The Music Box continues its annual tradition of showing the Bogart-Bergman classic in honor of Valentine's Day. Sun 2/8, 11:30 AM and Sat 2/14, 7:30 PM, Music Box, 3733 N. Southport, 773-871-6604, musicboxtheatre.com, $10.
CLLAW XXI: My Bloody Valentine This Chicago League of Lady Arm Wrestlers match features over-the-top outfits, a kissing booth, and a chance to win a date with one of the wrestlers. There's also music from Gay Name and Swimsuit Addition. Fri 2/14, 10 PM, Logan Square Auditorium, 2539 N. Kedzie, 773-252-6179 or 866-468-3401, lsachicago.com, $10.
I'll Do Anything to See Boobs Tonight: A Valentine's Burlesque Cabaret At the stroke of midnight, the Gorilla Tango Burlesque Geek Girls are all set to perform Valentine's Day-themed solos and group numbers. Advance tickets are recommended. Sat 2/14, midnight, Gorilla Tango Theatre, 1919 N. Milwaukee, 773-598-4549, gorillatango.com, $28.
Love Is Sweet: Valentine's Dessert Tasting and Happy Hour Wedding company Native and Posh celebrates the holiday of love with an appetizer and dessert tasting party. Each ticket includes a drink, entry into a raffle, and unlimited appetizers and desserts. Couples considering tying the knot can chat with some of wedding and dessert vendors. Thu 2/12, 6-8 PM, Blokes & Birds, 3343 N. Clark, 773-472-5252, nativeandposh.com.
Mad Mobster True Crime and Horror Expo For an offbeat Valentine's Day weekend, head to this convention to celebrate mobsters, meet special guests like Jon Polito from The Crow, and visit the Charles Manson exhibit. Fri 2/13-Sun 2/15, Hilton Chicago, 720 S. Michigan, 312-922-4400, madmonster.com, $50-$199.
Naked Girls Reading This Valentine's Day edition of Naked Girls Reading is themed "Love Hurts," and features, yes, naked girls regaling an audience with stories about heartbreak, crimes of passion, and romantic failures. BYO. Fri 2/13, 7 PM, Everleigh Social Club, 939 W. Randolph, nakedgirlsreading.com/chicago, $20, $35 per couple.
The Naked at the Art Museum Scavenger Hunt The Art Institute throws an adults-only scavenger hunt. Sat 2/14, 11 AM and 2 PM, Art Institute of Chicago, 111 S. Michigan, 312-443-3600, watsonadventures.com/public/event/the-naked-at-the-art-museum-scavenger-hunt-2, $41.
The Power of Sour Marz Community Brewing is throwing this anti-Valentine's Day event centered around the brewery's line of sour beers (available for sampling) and artist Paul Nudd's work, which adorns the bottles. Nudd's art will be on display, with prints made especially for the event available for purchase. Sat 2/14, 4-8 PM, Western Exhibitions, 845 W. Washington, second floor, 312-480-8390, marzbrewing.com.
Prom Night Chicago Art Department puts on a prom complete with streamers, balloons, and a photographer ready snap a picture of you and your date. Pick up a boutonniere or corsage by artists including Sarah and Joseph Belknap, Ali Noe, and Victoria Martinez, then dance to the Bored Enthusiast. Sat 2/14, 7-11 PM, Chicago Art Department, 1932 S. Halsted #100, 312-226-8601, chicagoartdepartment.org, $30-$200.
Slurping Turtle Choose from two four-course menus dubbed "I Think I Like You" and "I Know I Love You." During the meal the restaurant will screen classic romantic films like Gone With the Wind and Casablanca. Sat 2/14, Slurping Turtle, 116 W. Hubbard, 312-464-0466, slurpingturtle.com.
Walk of Shame Brunch at Mercat The morning after Valentine's Day, brunch at Mercat includes a Bloody Mary served with a churro on the side, poutine eggs Benedict, and more. Anyone who shows up in the previous night's outfit (with a selfie to prove it) receives a 20 percent discount. Sun 2/15, 10 AM-3 PM, Mercat a la Planxa, 638 S. Michigan, 312-765-0524, mercatchicago.com, $35.